More semi upsetting news.

Got a call today from my Geno for the blood work that was run a little over a week ago.  My testosterone levels were pretty high which just conferms the diagnosis of PCOS (Polycystic Ovary Syndrome).  Dr. Kolar talked to Dr. Robert Kaufman about his opinion, and he suggested that i be put on 100 mg of Clomid instead of the 50 mg originally given to me.  One more road block but with prayer, I'll make it through.  Caught myself crying while leaving a message on Dan's phone because he is sleeping.  I hate that he likes to drive at night.  Makes it really hard to talk to him when I need a shoulder or an ear.  He was always able to make me feel better.  Having to make myself get out of bed and not lay around.  If I lay around its not good.  I know God is in control  I just have to let the reigns go.

First time to blogging.

My main reason for keeping up with this and starting this, is because of my husband and mine's future kids.  You see, we recently found out that I (Tiffany) am infertile.  I have a disease called PCOS (Polycystic Ovary Syndrome).  It keeps me from releasing an egg and or from having a period at all.  I've been on Metformin since August but we didn't have a definite diagnosis until January 17th.  I was heartbroken.  All I have ever wanted was to be a mom and to love the children that God would someday bless me with.  Now, I have the emotions of feeling broken, or as I like to say "I'm brokee".  I see many getting pregnant or already having children in there life and I feel not just left out but I ask "Why me"?  You see, those of you whom are already parents may have your days where you just wish that your child would stop whining or crying.  Me, I wish that I could be blessed with a new development of any kind to be able to experience the wonderfulness of Motherhood.  I want to have a baby crying, I want that sleepless night, but most of all I want God's precious and perfect gift from heaven in my loving and open arms.
  To be told that you are infertile is a blow.  There may be some serious complications for me in the next couple of months ahead, and I feel alone even though I have wonderful friends and a wonderful husband by my side.  I fear the unknown, but am reminded that I must leave that in God's hands.  Dan and I don't know what the Lord plans to teach us in this process, or what he intends to show us, but we hope and pray that it is something so amazing that it leaves us thanking and rejoicing in his name.